/* ** ************************************************************************* ** ************************************************************************* ** ** NN NN SSSSSS XX XX ** NNN NN SS SS XX XX ** NN N NN SSS XX ** NN N NN SSS XX ** NN NNN SS SS XX XX ** NN NN SSSSSS XX XX ** The Non-Sequitur Express ** « an eclectic e-newsletter, e-published irregularly » ** Produced by Phillip Thorne ** nsx.underbase.org ** ** Volume 6, Issue 2: Sunday, 29 February 2004 ** Previous issue: Sunday, 14 January 2004 ** ** ************************************************************************* ** ************************************************************************* */ EDITOR: Happy Leap Day! and why it's "NSX." OBS & COGS: Headline font, camera-safety, TV repeats, LotR's Oscars... UPCOMING: "Enterprise" moves, new CGI TV, films. http://www.underbase.org/nsx/ - back issues http://www.underbase.org/blog - NSX::Blogmode http://www.underbase.org/nsx/index_plus.htm - extra content /* *************************************************************************** ** FROM THE EDITOR ** ************************************************************************ */ Welcome to this special Leap Day issue of NSX. I promise that such will be published no more than once per four years -- or rather, 99 times out of 400. And FYI: the abbreviation of "Non-Sequitur Express" is "NSX." Not "NSE," not "NS Express." That's "X" as in *ex*cession, *ex*ultation, *ex* cathedra. If you worry that "-SX" looks too much like the word "sex," remind yourself that it looks just as much like "sax," "six," and "Sox." It also resembles "sux," but that's an even less flattering comparison; so ignore that one. /* *************************************************************************** ** OBSERVATIONS & COGITATIONS ** ** More oversized headlines ** Camera-safety more important than gun-control? ** Common culture through repeats? ** Static aura furniture ** LotR:RotK's Oscar-shelf ** Awakening in your refrigerator ** ************************************************************************ */ Recently, my local NFL football team, the Philadelphia Eagles, lost their chance to play in the Superbowl for the third straight year -- a penultimate-failure that's apparently a record. The first-page headline in the next day's _Daily Local News_ (mon-19-jan, "Scratched out") was a full 1-5/8-inches tall. That's probably bigger than those for the Shuttle _Columbia_ disaster or the U.S. invasion of Iraq. I say "probably," because I can't find my records of those headlines. A standard gun-safety rule is, "Never point a gun at something you don't want to kill." In the wake of the Paris Hilton sex tape [] scandal, perhaps a similar rule should be formulated: "Never point a camera at something you don't want broadcast to the universe." This would be a great comfort to everyone ever embarrassed by a "naked baby on bear rug" image. I imagine that vegetarians forced to suffer that indignity are concerned first about the dead bear. (At the time, I had no idea who "Paris Hilton" was -- she's never been in SF, so why should I care? -- but the monolithic phrase "Paris Hilton sex tape" appeared so often, it might've been a macro in the news industry's word processors. "Mark Zandi of Economy.com" might be another one.) With the multiplication of media outlets (TV channels, internet, home videos, magazines) social commentators sometimes lament the loss of a common culture. However, some of those TV channels are devoted entirely to repeats of old programming (because they're cheap). Coupled with the NBC catch-phrase, "if you haven't seen it, it's new to you," I predict that eventually a common culture will be *restored*. The comfy executive chair I use at work has arms covered in some material that holds a static electrical charge; it's perceptible every time my arms approach within an inch, and my hair stands on end. It's not an "aura," but it sure *feels* like one. Thus far (23:30), "The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King" has won nine Academy Awards: those for Adapted Screenplay, Editing, Art Direction, Costume Design, Makeup, Original Score, Original Song, Sound, and Visual Effects. *** In the wed-21-jan issue of the _Daily Local News_, columnist Dot Kennedy wrote of a dream wherein she awakens upon the lower shelf of a refrigerator: "As I turned over, I could feel my husband's hand lying flat on the bed next to me. That freaked me out, even in my semi-conscious state. "Why," I wondered, "would there be a hand in Aunt Mae's refrigerator?" That was a completely pointless column, but one after my own heart -- though in my case, the fridge is my grandmother's, and it's always standing in for a TARDIS with no dimensionally-transcendental interior. I've likewise had the experience of finding a hand in my bed and freaking out; though it was in fact *my own* hand, rendered temporarily insensible. Moreover, I've wondered why there's a giant starfish clinging to my ceiling. Both situations are products of the so-called "hypnopompic state," which occurs between sleeping and waking (ie, dawn). The opposite state is called "hypnagogic." There are slight differences in their manifestations, but both states are also associated with "sleep paralysis" -- when your conscious mind is active, but voluntary control of your body has been suspended For Your Own Good. /* *************************************************************************** ** GIANT PUMPKINS ** and other improbable vegetables ** ************************************************************************ */ An old nursery rhyme speaks about a man who put his wife in a pumpkin shell. Although it's actually an allegory about a chastity belt, the literal interpretation is now possible [1]. The first segment of the HGTV program "Garden Giants 2: Bigger and Better" demonstrated the result of a New Hampshire effort to grow a champion oversized pumpkin. By oversized I mean "freaky huge," as in nearly 1400 pounds. It's a tradition at (in this case) the Topsfield Fair (US/MA/Topsfield), and achievement (nationwide) seems to have been accelerating over the past decade: Year 1984 . . . . . . . . 1993 1994 1995 1996 . . . 2000 . 2002 2003 Pounds 433 700 900 939 1061 1140 1337 1301 Much ado was made of the effort expended to lift the squash onto a platform for transport, and I wondered why it wasn't grown atop a cargo sling to begin with. This might also solve another problem: like a beached whale, the pumpkin had distorted under its own weight into a lumpy hemisphere -- but melons are often grown in suspended nets to achieve a spherical shape [2]. It's striking that the plant is even *capable* of such hypertrophy -- but it's obviously not *adapted* to it. The task would probably be easier in the microgravity regions of a future space colony. The program also reviewed giant vegetables (lettuce, celery) grown in Alaska. Such have long been known, thanks to the 24-hour arctic sunlight -- it's a short growing season, but very effective while it lasts [3]. http://www.topsfieldfair.org/tour/giant%20pumpkin.htm -- Topsfield Fair pumpkin results http://www.pumpkinfestival.com/ -- the Keene Pumpkin Festival, established in 1991, focuses on jack-o-lanterns http://waynesword.palomar.edu/pljan96.htm -- record squashes and pumpkins http://www.hgtv.com/hgtv/gl_vegetables/article/0,,HGTV_3650_1804211,00.html http://web.hgtv.com/hgtv/web/searchResults?site=HGTV&searchType=site&searchString=garden+giants&GoSearch.x=0&GoSearch.y=0 http://allsands.com/History/Objects/historynursery_nu_gn.htm -- PageWise's history of nursery rhymes http://www.crockford.com/wrrrld/nursery.html -- Douglas Crockford's "Nursery Rhymes for Our Times" [1] A 1400-pound pumpkin might make a dandy kids' play-house, or a very compact coach for the ball, but it's not much of a residence -- not like the veggie-domiciles described in _E.T.: The Book of the Green Planet_ (William Kotzwinkle, 1985 and 2002). Yes, the lovably-ugly XT comes from an entire *planet* of green thumbs. [2] In Japan, melons have been grown in plastic molds to achieve a cubical shape (good for packing) or to impress custom messages into the rind. If you see a pear inside a narrow-necked bottle, it was grown there (in its own personal hothouse) from an early age. Models of sailing ships are inserted into similar bottles with the rigging in a collapsed state; the masts are then tugged into place by a line trailing outside. [3] In the 1970s, it was proposed that orbiting mirrors be emplaced to illuminate agricultural reasons, improving yield and permitting night- time field-work. The Russian space agency had a plan called Znamya ("Banner") 2.5, in which a 30-m mirror would be deployed from a Progress supply ship en route to the Mir station; but it perished in 1998 due to tight funds. Although presenting a disk far smaller than the full moon, either design would deliver just as much light -- Luna actually has a low albedo, at only 0.07 (ie, it reflects only 7% of incident light) -- compared to 0.75 for Venus. Other shiny things in the sky: The 1960 NASA Echo experiment, three orbiting 30-m mylar balloons that acted as a passive radio reflector. The solar panels of the ISS (International Space Station). The Planetary Society's Cosmos 1 solar sail, to be launched this spring. http://www.asterism.org/tutorials/tut26-1.htm -- brightness of the Moon http://samadhi.jpl.nasa.gov/msl/QuickLooks/echoQL.html -- history of the Echo satellites http://science.nasa.gov/temp/StationLoc.html -- a set of tools for sighting the ISS and other satellites http://planetary.org/solarsail/index2.html -- Cosmos 1 /* *************************************************************************** ** UPCOMING ** ** "Enterprise" changes its timeslot ** "Game Over": new CGI primetime series ** Films ** ************************************************************************ */ "Star Trek: Enterprise" On wed-10-mar, the Wednesday-night UPN series moves from 20:00 to 21:00. This week, in "Azati Prime," the ship finally reaches the eponymous red giant star where the Xindi superweapon is being built. "Game Over" UPN, wed-10-mar-20:00, encore at fri-12-mar-20:00. Eight years after "ReBoot," a CGI series finally reaches network primetime -- but will it suffer the fate of every other primetime animated series besides "The Simpsons"? "Thunderbirds" Based on the Supermarionation series by British puppeteer Gerry Anderson, and directed by Jonathan Frakes ("Commander Riker" from ST:TNG). Features the famous pink limousine with six wheels. The site has a badly overdesigned Flash interface. http://workingtitlefilms.com/ http://www.supermarionation.net/ "I, Robot" Based (vaguely) on Isaac Asimov's collection of short stories. The Flash site is organized as a product-promotion site for the positronic home robot. http://irobotnow.com/en_us/index.php "The Chronicles of Riddick" This is a sequel to "Pitch Black" (2000), but is a departure from its mood (SF/space opera instead of horror), and planned as the first of a trilogy. Vin Diesel still holds the lead role, but for the style, imagine if Luke Skywalker was a thief and murderer -- and he was the *nicest* guy in the galaxy. http://www.apple.com/trailers/universal/thechroniclesofriddick/ "Appleseed" Masamune Shirow's story gets the big-screen treatment, with a cel- shaded CG style even for the human characters. Due for a 17-apr release in Japan. http://www.a-seed.jp/ http://www.apple.co.jp/quicktime/trailers/appleseed_large.html "Ghost in the Shell: Innocence" Another CG-heavy anime film. Whether it relates to the first movie and the recent TV series I don't know -- but the trailer is impressive. http://www.innocence-movie.jp/trailer/ Also: 12-mar "Agent Cody Banks: Destination London" 26-mar "Scooby Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed" 26-mar "Shaolin Soccer" (long-delayed) 2-apr "Hellboy" 16-apr "The Punisher" /* ************************************************************************ ** Legalese ** Acknowledgments ** Opt-in/out Instructions ** *********************************************************************** */ The original content {layout, text} of this newsletter is copyright 2004 Phillip Thorne. Reproduction in whole or in part is permitted only as per applicable copyright law, if all copyright notices remain intact, and if citation trails (URLs or otherwise) are provided. That said, if you think colleagues would find an issue useful, please reproduce it -- but also suggest they subscribe. Those creative works {books, films, TV, websites, software, toys, etc.} referred-to {reviewed, synopsized, quoted, condensed, analyzed, etc.} herein are the property of their respective owners, are referred-to according to copyright law as interpreted in the U.S., and are cited whenever possible. No {endorsement, infringement, insult} is {expressed, implied, intended}, except where specifically stated. Other data sources: Corona Upcoming Attractions www.corona.bc.ca UPN www.upn.com Yahoo! Movies movies.yahoo.com If you're receiving this newsletter, you've probably intentionally subscribed to it, or possibly you're interested in special topical coverage, or maybe I've sent you a teaser issue. To subscribe and unsubscribe, use the addresses below: Publisher: nsx@underbase.org (human) Newsletter: nsx-l@underbase.org (automated system) nsx-l-subscribe (to subscribe; blank subject) nsx-l-unsubscribe (to unsubscribe) /* *************************************************************************** ** *************************************************************************** ** The Non-Sequitur Express ** http://nsx.underbase.org/ ** Volume 6, Issue 2: Sunday, 29 February 2004 ** Copyright 1999-2004 Phillip Thorne, nsx@underbase.org ** *************************************************************************** ** ************************************************************************ */